I am sure the generation before us had these same worries...just sort of different. Perhaps they worried that their children would remember them always on the phone or spending the afternoons watching "their soap opera" .....I don't think the soaps are still on. Are they? I so remember afternoons at friends' houses (as a child) before they were called play dates and moms spending the entire time watching soap operas. Anyone?
So anyhow.......trying really hard to be present. To only blog on my own time. To be mindful. I fell into this blog recently. Loving her. I so relate to this post, also titled : They don't need us to be sorry, just present. I pledge to be present for these two beauties.
On a very similar note : check out this interesting article title : The Importance of One-on-One Time : Your undivided attention not only deepens your bond with your child but is a key to good behavior, too.
Also.....I recently read a blog post (somewhere) about a mom getting a dirty look at the grocery when she started loving and hugging on her tantrum throwing toddler. Hmmmmm. Don't you just hate tantrums? Don't you just H.A.T.E tantrums in public? Not too long ago our family was in Office Depot and the kids were being (in my opinion) very well behaved. They were mostly keeping their hands to themselves as opposed to all over the goods being sold, as welll as, off of each other. At one point I stopped to look at something and A kept walking. I called her back to me and she took the long way. Mind you, I could see her the entire time.....I just didn't want her or a situation to get away from me so I called out to her and asked her to return to my side. Anyhow, there was an older man who began to snicker. I look over at him and he was looking right at me. I called him out.
Me: "What?"
Older Man : "Well, you told her to come back to stand next to you and she didn't listen."
Me : speachless.
So much for calling him out huh?
Really, she was being quite good. Let's give that man two toddlers.....any two toddlers....let's find the two most perfect toddlers in the states and send him shopping with those two. Good luck!
I can't image being hakeled by a well meaning onlooker when one of my children was actually throwing a tantrum. Back to the hugging of a toddler during a tantrum.....at first my reaction was, Really? Be tougher, mom. Let the tantrum play itself out....which is what I generally try to do, although it is much easier to do so in the privacy of my own home rather than in public. Regardless, I try my best not to give in to tantrums as I worry that I am setting myself up for a future nightmare. But then I gave the hugging a tantrum throwing child some more thought....and tried it. This am G started throwing a fit about something. It might have turned into a tantrum or simply disovled...who knows? Regardless, my general philosophy is ignore fits. Today, rather than ignore, I immediately got down and hugged and kissed G and within minutes we moved on. Maybe it's time for a new parenting philosophy? Probably not, we're pretty tough over here....lots and lots of love but still......pretty tough. I guess I've learned a new strategy to use in a given situation. I can't image hugging away a tantrum but maybe.....maybe......I can use that strategy if I even come across that Office Depot man. I mean, I don't want him thinking my kids are naughty or don't behave well. (That's sarcasm....in case you couldn't tell)
Anyhow, I beat an early morning fit, but then later, I started to feel really crummy(I think I might be getting sick..Boo) and I wasn't so patient and huggy with a tantrum on the way out the door to the library this morning. Oh well, I try my best. I was very present at the library. Well, for most of the time. Husband was present while I browsed for books and then I was present while he shopped for books. We were present. Smart phone in my pocket but never removed.
No comments:
Post a Comment